I knew the time had come for me to choose between God and Sex.

This book is my story of how I made that choice, and what I discovered along the way that would change my life forever!

Navigate moral questions about sex, gender, and relationships with a Biblical ethic that is wholistic, compassionate, and empowering!

In 2018, Joshua Harris kissed purity culture goodbye and called into question the modern evangelical sexual ethic shared by Rob Bell and Matthew Vines that marriage makes it moral.

I was 30 years old and had (re)constructed my relationship with God, but I was still looking for the Bible verse, “thou shalt not have premarital sex” and facetiously hoping the rapture would come before I lost every man’s battle…again.

As a single Christian, there were only two options for a healthy sex life: “don’t do it” or “don’t judge me.”

I judged, because the only examples of sex that I saw were rooted in lust, objectified women, and resulted in fear, guilt, and shame. Sheila Wray Gregoire and others were beginning to uncover the reasons why #metoo was rapidly evolving into #churchtoo, but I already knew…

I knew the time had come for me to choose between God and Sex. This book is my story of how I made that choice, and what I discovered along the way that would change my life forever!

Sacred not Sinful – Blog (latest posts)

  • On Celibacy and Licentiousness – A Critique of Modern Moral Standards
    Debates over questions of polyamory, non-monogamy, and open relationships already shows signs of getting stuck in the historical and false dichotomy of licentiousness or celibacy, which has plagued theology since the early days of the church.
  • The Myth of Casual Sex
    I have yet to find a person to argue for the morality of “casual” sex. Some say it’s not immoral, but “it’s not hurting anyone” is a poor reason to do anything.
  • How to Overcome the Challenges of Sexual Diversity in the Church
    Then, somebody disagreed with me over a post I made on Facebook. I still don’t know who they are, but…conversations were had about me – without me, until a heart-felt and sad moment when I learned what the church leaders had decided must be done.

Bible Scholar & Sex Educator

I am on a mission to help Christians experience the love and freedom of knowing God in every part of life!

My work as a young adult leader in the church taught me the importance of education and led me to a PhD in Learning, Instruction, and Innovation.

In addition to the resources available on this page, I offer keynote speaking, workshop facilitation, and program design for Christian communities ready to grow in spiritual and sexual maturity.

Take the next step – put your faith into action!

Courageous Intimacy includes the tools, experiences, and connections you need to help you master the art of sexual integrity, freedom, & skill!

Key outcomes:

  • A clear conscience before God
    • solves the problem of feeling guilty, uncertain
    • alternative is ignoring the conscience, repressing your spiritual needs around sex OR living in fear of this blessing from God
  • A deep understanding of the body
    • solves the problem of ignorance about how to enjoy mutual pleasure
    • alternative is missing out on the capacity of the body for mind-blowing experiences
  • Ability to direct desire with integrity
    • solves the problem of feeling out of control
    • being true to what you want instead of dominated by desire, society, expectations
  • Language and tools of communication
    • solves the problem of relationship challenges
    • alternative to stonewalling, blowing up, silencing needs and desires, creating distance from the partner

For more information or an invitation to join the waitlist, click below to visit www.courageousintimacy.org

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